I woke up on Sunday morning with an upset stomach, and my Dad always said I was overly dramatic when I was sick so:
7:00 First thought, “too much to drink last night?” No, only had two beers, couldn’t be that. “Dehydration?” Could be, better drink some water.
9:00 This isn’t helping much, ughhh my stomach.
9:30 Huuuuughhhh, huuuughhhhh. Head in a Senegalese toilet. This Can’t be very sanitary.
10:30 Ugghhh still feel like shit. What if I have something serious? Appendicitis? I heard that you get a sharp pain in your gut – ughhhhh – sounds about right. Do they even have surgery places in St. Louis? Maybe I should call a doctor.
11:00 I’ll call Sara firt and ask her what I should do.
“hey sara, hows it goin”
“Yeah Im not feeling so good”
“No clinics open on a Sunday huh, great”
“Yeah I don’t wanna wait till Monday”
“Meet you at the hospital in town? Okay”
“pay up front huh? Okay I’ll bring some cash. See you in 20 minutes”
11:07 Okay stand up now – No, no, no, back down, back down
11:10 Okay slowly this time. Okay open the door. Damn its sooo hot out – ughhhh – don’t pass out in the road.
“Psst, Psst, Taxi!”
“En ville, a l’hopital”
11:20 “merci”
Now where do I go? And is Sara here yet? I’ll call her
“Hey are you here yet?”
“10 minutes okay, so where should I go?”
“Right after the gates, okay, see you soon”
So is it this right or this one... Ughhhh, maybe I’ll ask this guy.
“Bonjour, ou est-ce que je peux trouver un docteur?” (Hello, where can I find a doctor?)
“ah d’accord, merci” (ah okay, thank you)
Now what the hell did he say through the doors over here? Arrgh where the hell is sara!? Hmm maybe this is the place to go.
“Bonjour, J’ai le mal au ventre, est-ce que je peux voir un docteur?” (Hello, I am having stomach pain, can I see a doctor?)
“D’accord, j’attend pour un moment” (Okay, I will wait a moment)
I guess I’ll just sit her – Uggghh - I better not puke in the hallway…
11:30 Ah finally.
“Hey Sara”
“don’t worry, they don’t have an open bed just yet, so im just waiting”
“Yeah my stomach hurts pretty bad and I keep getting this sharp pain in my stom– uggghhh”
“Yeah I think its gotta be the fish from last night as well, is anyone else sick?”
“Just me, of course… Hey looks like they have an open bed for me.”
11:40 So I guess I just lie down here. Doesn’t really look like they cleaned it or anything after that other guy used it. Maybe this plasticy stuff on it makes that okay…
“Est-ce que le docteur viens” (Is the doctor coming?)
“D’accord” (okay)
“Elle ne peut pas rester ici? Mm D’accord…” (She cannot stay here? Mm okay…)
I guess Sara’s not allowed to be in the room. Ah this sucks, why did I eat that stupid fish!? Krista and Kate are gonna have a laugh when they find about about this. All that bullshit about the dangers of meat, damn vegetarians. Uggghh where’s this doctor!?
11:50 Finally this must be him. White coat, stethoscope, looks pretty official I guess.
“Bonjour”
“Oui j’ai mal au ventre depuis cet matin et j’ai vomi plusier fois” (Yes, I have stomach pain since this morning, and I have thrown up several times)
“Pardon?”
“Je ne comprends pas. Est-ce que ma amie reviens pour umm translater?” (I don’t understand, can my friend come back to translate?)
11:52 “so they wanna know how long I’ve been here, umm about 3 weeks right?”
“No I’ve taken my malaria pills everyday”
“no this is the first time I’ve felt sick”
“haha oui je mange le thiebodienne”
“He thinks it was the plates at the beach, ah I see.”
“Yeah okay I’ll give you the money and you can go buy the drugs, thanks Sara”
11:55 ugghh so now what? Is this my nurse? Oh damn that’s a big looking needle – are they hooking me up to an IV!? Uggghhh I don’t know if I can handle this. Phew she’s just cleaning the top of my wrist, maybe this will numb it as we – ARGHH FUCK!
“Je voms, je voms, non maintenant!”
Huuuuughhh, huuuuuuuuuugghhhh, ugh shit. Huuuuughhhhh.
Ugghh I guess she doesn’t want me puking in the sink. At least the needle is already in. Will it hurt when they put the actual tube in? Wait whats she doing with my fing – AH FUCK – Agh what the hell did she stab my finger for? Blood sample maybe? Okay this must be the actual IV drip that shes about to attach. Okay that didn’t hurt. Good. Uhhh I hate having needles in me – am I gonna faint? Okay just lie down, close your eyes. Don’t think about it….
2:15 ugghh how long was I out for? What time did I even get here? Looks like the IV bag is empty, so what now? Wheres that nurse? Is Sara back yet? Looks like the nurse is gonna take the IV out now – Agh could this lady be any rougher? Hey looks like Sara’s back.
“Hey”
“oh wow theres a lot of stuff”
“You had to go to 3 different pharmacies! Wow thsnks a lot”
“Yeah I’m feeling a little better, my stomach still hurts a bit, but im not puking or anything. I am really light headed though, do you have any water?”
“Haha yeah thanks head Toubab no more fish on the beach, I’m warning all the other volunteers about this excursion. Hey here comes the doctor”
“D’accord donc je prends les medicaments et je serai bien?” (Okay so I take this medicine and I will be fine?)
“Merci beaucoup”
2:20 “Okay lets get out of here. I’m just gonna try standing up first – nope, nope lets wait a couple minutes”
2:23 “I’ll try again – nope ah-ha maybe I need a wheelchair for now…”
“you’ll go get one? Cool, thanks Sara”
2:26 Okay I can do this, just sit down in the chair. Okay there, not so hard.
“lets really leave now”
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